A guide for the wali
What your role is, and what it is not.
1 min read · Updated 4 November 2026
Your role is to protect, not to control
A wali looks after the interests of the woman in his care. You help her see clearly, you ask the questions she may not be able to ask, and you make sure the man is serious. The decision to marry is also hers, and a marriage cannot be forced on her.
What to look for
Character and religion come first. Ask about his prayer, how he treats his parents, how he earns his living and what people who know him say about him. Ask to speak with someone who knows him.
How Amaanah works for you
You confirm your email and your number, and you accept your role. We only email you when she has a match. That email holds a wali code. With the code and her date of birth you can read that conversation, and you can end the match if you do not agree. The brother receives your number and contacts you.
When a brother contacts you
Take your time. Invite him to speak with you, involve the family, and arrange a meeting. There is no need to rush and no shame in saying no.
This is general guidance, not a religious ruling. For your own situation, please ask a qualified imam or scholar.